The Battle between the Selves

Why is resisting temptation so difficult? Why do we carelessly trade the things we want in the future for the things we want here and now?

Though we may aspire to be in-shape, have a large bank account, and play the piano beautifully, these goals take time to achieve. And no one individual day—no matter how disciplined you are—is likely to make a huge impact.

Rather, it’s the culmination of many disciplined days (or months, or years) that gets you to your goal.

With this reality, we tend to see only the present and we ignore the future. Whatever the present self wants, the present self gets. Sure, we might be short changing our future selves, but hey, one day is not going to matter.

And so goes the unequal battle between the selves. In one corner, is the present self—big, strong, powerful, tangible.

In the opposite corner is the future self—weak, blurry, vague, unclear.
Dr. Daniel Goldstein, Ph. D., is a behavioral economist and a professor at the London Business School who studies decision-making—in particular, personal financial decisions made over the course of a lifetime. He describes the “battle of the selves” in a brief and humorous talk prepared for the nonprofit, award-winning, video-based website TED. (TED is an idea exchange platform with a global audience of millions.) Click on the video link below.

The problem, Dr. Goldstein explains, is with how we perceive the future self.
“The future self is not even around. It’s off in the future. It’s weak. It doesn’t even have a lawyer present! There’s nobody to stick up for the future self—and so the present self can trounce all over its dreams.”

So what does this mean when it comes to saving for retirement? The present self wants nothing more than for you to buy and consume, while the future self wants you to save and plan.

Without an acknowledgement of the future self, it is easy to get off track with saving for retirement. The financial needs of the present are too real and substantial.

However, saving for retirement in the YMCA Retirement Fund’s 403(b) Smart Account does not have to wear down your self-discipline. Your savings simply get put into that account automatically before you see them.

Set up your account by submitting the 403(b) Smart Account form to your Y’s HR or payroll department, and you’re done! It really doesn’t require day-to-day discipline—unlike resisting a dessert, or going to the gym when you don’t feel like it. Track your account balance on www.yretirement.org to see how easily your savings grow.

If your present self does a little bit of saving now, your future self can spoil you later!

- YMCA Retirement Fund

Respiratory Distress ;-)

If you live Western Mass one of the best known and most loved traditions is the Holyoke St. Patty’s day road race and parade. For years I’ve attended the race and every year, drink in hand, I’d think “I’ll run next year.” So this year, I did and I was excited about it. Oddly, enough before the start of the race, watching the crowds drinking beer and eating amazingly delicious looking greasy food I thought “maybe it is more fun being a spectator.”

I had a lot of nervous energy getting ready to leave the house before this race, but I didn’t attribute any of it to the run itself. I should have, and I should have taken some time to focus, I am still NOT a seasoned runner by any means and this route is a pretty hilly six mile haul.

As usual there were a large number of TFLers (Train For Life-ers) running this race together, which is always a fun time, great motivation and support. My friend Jon, who recently moved to Boston returned home to run with me and we decided before hand we’d actually run together. Now, I know he’s faster than me, always has been but I underestimated just how much. It became pretty clear, even in the first mile. we were not an equal match. Running with people at a faster pace is supposed to improve your pace… not on Saturday! In general, I’ve attributed most of my running struggles to head games. This was probably the case Saturday, regardless, this run handed me a load of crap and I didn’t deal with any of it well. Besides feeling like a dog chasing a car, trying to pace with Jon, I couldn’t concentrate on anything! Not my breathing, my pace, nothing! And I wasn’t having fun, although, the guy pushing the running stroller full of beer did make me giggle. I wanted to stop… like every 60 feet, I wanted to stop. At one point, having slowed down so I could catch up, I complained to Jon. “I have a stitch and I just can’t breathe!” He’s not a man of many words, he’s also a nurse, so if your going to collapse he’s a pretty good guy to have around. In this case his response was simply “Let’s Go.” So I did. He told me later in the day had I presented in the ER breathing the way I was breathing during the race they would have assumed I was having a respiratory emergency…. delightful.

         It always comes down to a matter of your mind believing what your body is already capable of doing. This has been an on going battle for me, probably will continue to be. In reality its the same battle we fight against tackling the pile of paperwork on our desks or putting the laundry away. You can do it, you should do it, you’ll feel so good when it’s done! For me when it comes to running and training when I’m done, even though I feel great, I think I can always do better. Maybe I need to do I better job in celebrating the simple act of finishing something I’ve started. Truth is I hope I’m always looking to get better, if there isn’t something greater to strive for then what’s the point?!

- Lauren Anderson, AYP

My Child is my Sanity

This past Saturday, I put training aside and had a Mommy/Daughter day with my amazing daughter, whom I call Monkey. We planned our big day earlier in the week.

Monkey has been having a difficult past few weeks and has been saltier than usual (my friends call her Little Miss Salty for many very good reasons). I’ve tried to find out why, with very little success. However, last Thursday night, as I was tucking her into bed I asked her what was going on. She admitted to me it’s because I haven’t been around as much as she’s used to.

“Mommy, you go running and you ride your bike like a big girl, and you swim swim siwm and I can’t go with you”! Ah – now we are getting somewhere. So, I asked her if she wanted to spend the day together that Saturday doing whatever she wanted to do. Mommy wouldn’t run, ride or swim. And we can go and do whatever she wanted to do. Her eyes lit up like Christmas and her smile was so big. She’s four and she is very much so a mamma’s girl. Big time. When I’ve traveled for work, she sleeps with my pillow and one of my shirts on. When I went to New Mexico I was gone a whole week. I actually think it might have been harder for me. My little Monkey wrapped one of her necklaces around my wrist and made me promise to wear it every single day – and this was in her words, not mine – so I can look at it and know she missed me – and I did. I didn’t even take it off when I went to bed. 

I’ll admit, as I’ve been navigating my way through my training, work, teaching classes, and managing things at home, I didn’t realize the time it would take away from my Monkey. Luckily, in true four-yr-old fashion, she found out a way to let me know. This isn’t the first mommy/monkey day I’ve planned. Since she could walk, I’ve made a point for her and I to have “our time” together. What we do has progressed since she’s gotten older but I try to do it once a month with her - just something special for just the two of us. I realize as she continues to grow her interests will change and her friends will become a greater priority in her life. Until that time comes, I want as many special moments with her as possible while she’s this sweet and innocent and simple. However, given the new craziness that has recently been introduced into our regular schedule, we were in the need of an additional one-on-one special days.

I asked her, what should we do on our day together? She shrugged her shoulders and said “Can we go to the park? And get our toes and nails painted? And play? And sneak out of the house”? Well, the last question threw me, and made me laugh. I asked her, why does she want to sneak out? She shrugged again and said “why not Mommy? Why not sneak out? It would be fun and we can pretend”. I reminded her that we really don’t have any reason to be sneaky as it won’t be a secret we have a mommy/monkey day. She said point-blank “mommy, your missing the point. We just pretend and use our imagination. Remember that in your head?” I giggled and she called me out “I’m not kidding mommy. I’m serious”. Obviously, yes I know. We can sneak out and we can pretend and thank god I have my little monkey to help me remember how.  

So, Saturday, we set-out and had lunch together; got our toes and nails painted; got some ice-cream (both of us bubble-gum flavored. I let her pick) and went to the park and played tag, chase and anything else she could think of. When we got home, she helped me cook dinner, then we spent the rest of the night (until she fell asleep) outside sitting around our fire-pit. I went to bed many hours later and at about 5am, I felt her little head nuzzled under my chin. Then about 7am she pulled the blinds open and jumped on my stomach yelling “Mommy! It’s morning time”!

To say my little monkey is my sanity is a dramatic understatement. She keeps me firmly planted on the ground.

- Lindsey Lerit, AYP

Just the Beginning (Part 2)

Short update on my journey with Train for Life since you last heard from me at the end of October 2011. Weeks after completing the Rugged Maniac 5K, during a moment of temporary insanity and at the encouragement of the TFL crew, I signed up to participate in the May 2012 Tough Mudder race at Mount Snow. Tough Mudder events are 10-12 mile obstacle courses designed by the British Special Forces; they proclaim themselves to be “the toughest event on the planet.” This stuff is no joke and I decided it could never be too early to start to train. I began to step up my running, registered for another 5K, and increased my mileage. But I still wasn’t feeling like that was enough. What better way to prepare my body for that kind of torture?  Train for a half marathon… naturally. Clearly, my streak of insanity had continued, or so I thought. It’s important I mention that I have been following the lead of my fellow TFLer’s into these races. I was inspired by those around me setting goals and aiming high and I believed I should do the same. I set my sites on two things, hit 100lbs lost by March 15 (my TFL anniversary) and a February trip to Florida to run…or walk, the 2012 Disney Princess ½ Marathon.

While it might sound like I made all these decisions lightheartedly and with an “I got this” mentality. I questioned myself and my ability every step of the way. At this point I had lost over 70lbs, had a couple small races under my belt and was stronger than I had ever been but it’s true we are always our own worst critics and I had some serious doubts about my plans. To be honest that doubt always lingered but the people who never doubted me were my friends at Train for Life. I have joked with Drew that if I announced that I planned to climb Mt. Everest next week his reply would be “yeah buddy!” So, on the days that I didn’t believe in myself I relied on the fact that others had faith in me. For those of us prepping for long races, half and full marathons, Drew put together a 15 week running program. I’m not exaggerating when I say I struggled through almost every training run. I would listen to my friends talk about their runs, their pace, their mileage, and their…runner’s high?! I started to loathe the nice lady on my Nike app who reminded me of my pace every half mile.  I questioned myself, why I did I decide to train for this over the winter? How much money would I lose if I back out now? Why did I do this? WHY did I DO this? My weight loss was a different struggle. I plateaued, like we all do, more than once. I did my fair share of beating myself up over 1lb, 2lbs, and all that wine I drank last weekend. And I certainly had a few “pull yourself together kid” conversations with my friends, there was no doubt, this part of my journey had some bumps.

Mile 11

These thoughts stayed with me for months, pretty much until race day, at which point my goal was finish… running, walking, crawling, just finish. There is a photo of me somewhere on this page at mile 11, I look happy but at that moment I’m pretty sure I could have stopped and walked the last two miles, no question. But my longtime friend and running partner that day kept running and so did I. It was in mile 11 that I let myself think back on the previous 11 months (coincidence? Hmmm). I thought about what a different person I was, not just physically but in all areas of my life. The goals I had achieved and the ones I had yet to conquer, the people who’ve told me I’ve inspired them and most importantly the incredible people who have inspired and supported me. When I was done I was amazed with myself, I spent the entire rest of that day saying “I can’t believe we ran a half marathon this morning!… No, seriously, I can’t believe it.” What I failed to recognize until that day was the challenge of training truly had prepared my body, it was my head that was creating the struggle.

I flew back from Florida just over a week ago considering myself a runner for the very first time. Yesterday, March 6, 2012, nine days before my 1 year anniversary at Train for Life I hit the 100lb mark. I am not the first of us to reach this milestone and I’m certain I won’t be the last. When I started out a year ago it was never my goal to lose 100lbs or to run a race of any kind I simply wanted to be healthier and happier. And I am. It’s funny now that I’m here, what should feel like the end of something instead feels like the beginning of something much bigger. I’m still not sure what, but I can’t wait for whatever comes next.

- Lauren Anderson, AYP

My Running Partner Sings to Me

It’s terrible singing. Seriously horrible. And it’s also hilarious. I never know when it’s coming. We’ll have just finished a totally different conversation and the next thing I know, she’s singing. This past weekend I found out that she doesn’t pre-determine the song. She waits until the moment “strikes”. So far I’ve heard Madonna, Brooks N Dunn, Kelly Clarkson, Green Day and Big and Rich.

In my previous post I mentioned I’m running the half-ironman with four other gals. Their names are Krista, Erin, Mary, and Alycia (see side photo – listed in order. Alycia is missing though. I’m the fourth in the photo. Oh, by the way, these gals have no idea I have just posted their photo – so if you know them, don’t tell them. Got it?). Mary is the one that sings. We actually call her Mamma Mary. Not because she’s motherly in the sense she looks after us. It’s because she is scary and you typically do what she wants when she wants it in the way she wants it done without argument or delay. Much like a child would do for their mother when they are in big trouble.  She’s not this way all of the time, but when she gets to this point, we have all learned to not question and just – do as we are told. This occasional demeanor makes it that much more amusing for us when she sings on our runs. Out of all of us, Mary is the most conservative and introverted. Then comes Erin (I would actually describe her as very laid-back), followed by Alycia (She is very funny. Very sarcastic. Calls it like she sees it), then actually Krista and I bring up the rear in a tie on who is more outgoing. Krista will talk to anybody and the first time we ran together we found ourselves greeting every single person we ran by, pretty much in unison, which we then found to be hilarious so we made it into a game. The rest of the gals made fun of us, playfully, of course. So, given our dynamic, we each feel that we have “rubbed-off” on each other in positive ways. I honestly do not think Mary would have come out of her shell as much as she has if we all weren’t together as much as we are. Most weekends we try to get one or two workouts in together as a group. Normally a ride or a run as they are the easiest to coordinate.

We are also all in the same van together for our first competition of the season: a 36 hour Ragner Relay Race across Cape Cod, May 11-12. This will be our second time competing in this event. If you’ve ever participated in an event like “Reach the Beach” this is pretty much the same thing. Hundreds of teams made up of 12 runners each, split into two vans of 6. Each runner has pre-selected a grouping of “legs” they will run for their team. Each runner is required to run 3 legs, and the distances vary as well as the difficulty. Typically, teams try to be very strategic (as this is a competition) on which runners will go in what van and who will take what leg(s). Normally, you will want your most experienced runners to take the harder legs, the legs with a farther distance, or both. Ragner actually pre-groups the legs for teams in groups of 3, and already takes these strategies into consideration for you. Well, as much as we want to be strategic, we also want to have fun. Collectively as a team, we realize we will not win this race, and we are completely fine with it. With that being said, we purposely set-up teams this year so the five of us tri-gals would be together. Now, do you remember how I said there are 6 members per van? Well, the remaining 7 members of our team or all guys. Are you doing the math in your head? If you are, you have already figured out that in my van there are 5 gals and one very lucky guy (though he most likely will not feel that way about an hour into this race….). His name is Michael; however the five of us gals have already started to call him Mikey (this is why I’m pretty sure he’ll change his mind about his situation about an hour into the race). We ran with him last year so he’s not unfamiliar to the competition – or us honestly. But last year there was one other guy in my van and he and Mikey had the ability to sleep outside at one of our van exchanges (meaning after all runners in Van 1 finishes their first grouping of runs – or legs, the whole team with both vans meet at an exchange point. Van 1 will then exchange over the race baton to Van 2 and Van 2 takes off on their first set of legs. Van 1 will then drive ahead to the next exchange to await the final member of Van 2 so we can start our second set of legs. Then so on and so forth. ), giving the 4 girls the van. This year, parts of the course are different and my van does not have any outdoor sleeping areas at any of our exchanges. If Mikey climbs onto the roof to sleep (no, he will not jump. Knock that off. The van isn’t moving at the exchanges anyway), I will not blame him.

Throughout each runner’s leg, the van will drive along with the runner for two purposes: to monitor the runner and to cheer her/him on. There are a few legs where a runner will be on a path (like in the woods) where the van will be unable to follow. I actually have one of these legs, my second one, which is also my longest, the hilliest and is at night. Anyway, we are already probing Mary to find out which song she’ll sing to us from the road as we drive by and cheer her on. She’s taking requests but I have a feeling she’ll still sing whatever song “strikes” her. Erin will sleep the whole time (she did that last year), Alycia will make us all laugh, I’ll get lost (I’m terrible with directions and got lost on my last leg last year, and was given the nickname “Wrong way L Diddy”), and Krista will make a new friend who she’ll randomly invite to ride with us in the van – until Mary throws this poor soul out at the next exchange. Mikey will probably start drinking heavily. Like a bunch of monkey’s in a sidecar…..without a driver.

Needless to say I’m really looking forward to these two days of very little sleep, a lot of running, and endless laughs. I’m sure I’ll come home with some good stories. Hopefully I will be able to share them with you.

Wish Mikey luck!

- Lindsey Lerit, AYP

Road to a Half-Ironman (Part 1)

You know, I’ll admit. When I first registered for this race, I don’t think I fully realized what I was getting myself into. At all. Though, I am very much so up for the challenge.

This race I am referring to is a Half-Ironman, this August, on Lake Winnipesauke, NH. The Timberman, as it’s called will be my first half-ironman. At this point I am not entirely sure if it will be my last. Honestly, I’m hoping it won’t, but I also realize I can’t really determine that until after I’ve actually finished the race.

Let’s break down what a half-ironman actually means:

1.2 swim, 56 mile bike, 13.1 run = 70.3 miles.

About two weeks ago I began my official training for this event, and I’d love to take you all along on this journey with me. I’m not sure how each post will go as each day of my training is different. But if anything, I hope that by writing down what I’m experiencing, it will not only keep me motivated but maybe motivate somebody else to push towards your own goal. And I think it will also help keep me sane. Let’s hope.

Right now, meaning today at this very moment, I’m excited to compete. There have been other days where I’m not so excited and find myself more frustrated than anything else. These less enthusiastic days currently occur when I’m in the pool – and this is because I’m not a swimmer. I’m a runner and have competed in races prior, including my first full marathon in October of 2011. I also run for fun, and to release stress. Have you ever heard anybody tell you that once they get into a rhythm they can run forever? That’s me. I’ll stop a run only because time doesn’t allow me to continue any further. The same goes for riding. There is just something about being on a bike and watching the scenery around you just zip-by that is so much fun. I’ve been on rides where I completely forget I’m riding. I’m not sure that makes sense, but it’s true. I put my buds in my ears, set off on my route and literally just enjoy the wind in my face. But swim. Hmmmm. I can tread water…… and swim under water, so I can hold my breath (yay!) …… and that’s about it (boo!). I think if I could do the doggie paddle from one side of the lake to the other, I’d be golden (of course that’s only if everybody else was doing the doggie paddle. If not, I’d just look….crazy). However, chances are really good that I’d be disqualified if I even attempted that. Not to mention I’d look completely ridiculous. Throughout the race, volunteers known as “angels” monitor the athletes and look for signs of severe fatigue, dehydration, injury, or any person who has fallen behind in their time and may need encouragement to push forward. I have a feeling my “angel” would just laugh at me, and suggest I just give-up and climb into the boat. Honestly, who competes in a half-ironman and does the doggie paddle? Have you ever heard of somebody winning a half-ironman and swam 1.2 miles in less than an hour doing the doggie paddle? No, you haven’t because it probably hasn’t happened. And if it has, that person was disqualified. And that will not this gal! So, needless to say, the swim portion of this event is my weakest and my biggest concern – which has become my greatest point of stress.

I overthink everything I do in the water. Am I picking my head up too far out of the water? How many strokes should I take between breathes? Wait….did I forget to breath? Am I kicking too hard or too much? Is my form where it needs to be? By the time I’m done with one lap, I’m frustrated, and choking on a mouthful of water. I realize I need to relax. I just haven’t figured out how just yet because I want to swim. I want to swim well, just as well as the other gals I’m competing with. I’ve signed myself up for private lessons, which I think will help. My tri-gals are so wonderful – but they aren’t teachers. They give me wonderful points (unfortunately though all at the same time, and they all conflict. I’m surprised I haven’t drown yet) and they are great to practice with, but I’m already in my head enough as it is already. I love them. I don’t need them in my head as well. I can’t think with me there, and I really need to think. Drowning is not an option (though that would never happen – not with the amount of “angels” that will be in the water). Even more so – disqualification is NOT an option. Why is this even more so? Because this is more likely with my lack of swim skills. I have 2 hrs to complete the swim without being disqualified. I have 10 hrs to complete the race. As long as I get my skills up enough to get out of the water under 2hrs I know I can make up time in the bike and the run. That is my only swim goal, at this point.

I’ve also registered for two triathlons prior to the half-ironman and have scheduled some outdoor swims in Walden Pond. As I just mentioned, my swim goal is to finish under the disqualifying time, but I still want to do it “right”.

My overall goal, of course, is to finish. I want that bib that says 70.3 miles. And I want it right next to my other bibs. My run bibs. My bike bibs. I want that high you get from accomplishing something so……wonderful and magnificent. I know that might sound silly or corny – but it’s so true. After each race I’ve ever competed in, I’ve experienced the most amazing feelings. 70.3 – I can’t even imagine what that will feel like. And right now, I’m three weeks into training for it.

I think this is enough for now. See you next time!

- Lindsey Lerit, AYP

I’m Only Half Crazy

You might have heard: I am running a half marathon on April 22nd.  Up until six months ago, when I committed to running the race, I never would have thought I’d be running a half marathon.  Heck, I was still in denial until I started training 10 weeks ago.  Running just isn’t my thing.  It’s boring (especially on the treadmill) and it hurts.  I ran in the Rye Derby in 2007 and while that was only five miles, it might as well have been an ultra marathon.  I hadn’t run five miles at one time since junior high cross country and I don’t think that I’ve run further than 3.5 miles since that painful Derby day.  So why then am I jumping all the way up to 13.1 miles?  Easy, a friend double dog dared me.

OK, not really but close enough.  Last July I convinced one of my couch potato friends to participate in the Spartan Race with me later that summer.  A funny thing happened; he started training and fell in love with running.  So once he was done crawling through mud at the Spartan Race, he suggested that we run a half marathon.  How could I say no?  After all, I had talked him into the Spartan Race; it was the least I could do.  We rounded up a few more friends, including my wife, and now five of us will run the half marathon and another friend will run the 8K on the same day.

The worst part of longer distance races is never the actual race; rather it’s the training and time commitment required before the race.  I have been following a 12-week program to get ready for race day and I am now convinced, after completing 10 weeks, that race day is going to be easy.  That’s only because of the time and effort that I have put in so far.  The plan calls for runs on three days a week and cross-training another two days.  In the beginning, even the short runs were painful.  But after the first few weeks, the three, four and five mile runs became “easy” and pain free.  I’ve increased my weekend runs by one mile each week starting with a three mile run in week one and reaching 12 miles by week 10.  I can’t believe that I now find myself saying things like “It’s an easy four- mile run today” or “this weekend is going to be easy; it’s only a five-mile run”.

I can honestly say this is not a challenge I would have taken on by myself.  Having my wife and friends train for the race at the same time has made all the difference.  It’s great having my wife support me and allowing me to spend close to two hours on a Saturday training.  In turn it feels good supporting her while she spends the same amount of time (maybe a little bit longer) training on Sunday.  It’s also a lot of fun to fire off a text message after completing a training run to my friends letting them know how I did.  Race weekend should be a bunch of laughs as well, starting with dinner the night before and continuing through the post race “party”.

So what’s next?  Well, now that running doesn’t hurt anymore, I think I am going to do a lot more of it.  I found a website where you can enter your miles and compete in challenges–just another way to motivate me and keep things interesting.  I just discovered a summer running series that consists of three, five, seven, nine, and 11-mile runs from June until mid-August that I think I am going to sign up for.  I still have two Spartan Races to compete in this summer, so I should be busy.

The same friend that caught the running bug last summer just told me today that next up is a full marathon to which I replied “I don’t think I will ever run a marathon because I’m not CRAZY, only half crazy…”

- Ed Philipp, Rye YMCA Chief Operating Officer